Ten bizarre inventions from the past that never caught on

People once caged babies several stories above the street

Ever wonder what happened to all those "revolutionary" gadgets that promised to change our lives? Some ideas were just too weird, too early, or too wonderfully impractical to survive. Let's take a nostalgic trip through the patent office's hall of shame.

Back when fresh air was considered a cure-all, London parents who lived in apartments faced a dilemma: how to give their babies outdoor time without a yard? The solution was a wire cage that hung outside the window, suspending Junior several stories above the street. Parents would just pop the baby in the cage and go about their day.

Shockingly, this didn't catch on. Perhaps it was the image of infants dangling precariously over busy sidewalks.

Imagine a giant goldfish bowl on your head, lined with cork, with only a thin slit to see through. That was the Isolator, designed to help people concentrate by blocking out all distractions. The inventor, Hugo Gernsback, thought sensory deprivation was the key to productivity. An attached oxygen tank let you breathe while you worked.

The problem? Looking like a deep-sea diver at your desk isn't exactly conducive to office camaraderie. Plus, trying to type while essentially wearing a fish tank proved impractical.

This battery-powered cone featured a small motor that rotated the ice cream for you, so you could just stick out your tongue and let technology do the rest. It was supposed to prevent drips and ensure even licking coverage.

The invention raised an important question: had we become so lazy that rotating our wrist was now an insurmountable challenge? Apparently, the answer was no. The motorized cone disappeared faster than ice cream on a summer day.

This amphibious bicycle promised to let you pedal across lakes and rivers just as easily as riding down Main Street. It featured a boat-like hull and paddle wheels instead of regular tires. The inventor envisioned commuters cycling across waterways, avoiding bridge traffic entirely.

Unfortunately, the Cyclomer was heavy, slow on both land and water, and required the leg strength of an Olympic athlete to move at anything faster than a crawl.

Dr. John Brinkley convinced thousands of men that transplanting goat testicles into humans would restore youth and vigor. For the bargain price of $750 (about $12,000 today), you could have surgery in his Kansas clinic and supposedly regain the vitality of your younger days.

Unsurprisingly, the procedure didn't work—goat glands don't function in human bodies. Brinkley eventually lost his medical license, but not before making millions.

When cars first became common, someone invented a net-like contraption that attached to the front bumper to scoop up pedestrians before running them over. The idea was that the person would land safely in the net instead of under the wheels. It looked like an industrial-sized butterfly net.

The fatal flaw? Getting hit by a car and caught in a net is still getting hit by a car. Plus, the contraption made vehicles longer and harder to maneuver, probably causing more accidents than it prevented.

Picture this: you're stuck in bed recovering from illness, and what you really need is a full-size piano suspended over your body. That's what one inventor thought, anyway. The piano hung horizontally above the patient, who could supposedly play while lying flat on their back.

Beyond the obvious safety concerns of dangling a heavy musical instrument over sick people, there was the question of who actually wants to play piano while confined to bed.

In an era when dimples were considered irresistibly charming, someone invented a face-shaping device that promised to create them artificially. The contraption used springs and knobs to press into your cheeks for 15 minutes daily until dimples supposedly formed permanently.

It didn't work, of course—dimples are genetic, caused by variations in facial muscle structure. But that didn't stop people from trying.

L. Ron Hubbard claimed this modified lie detector could measure the electrical characteristics of your thoughts and help achieve spiritual enlightenment. Users held two tin cans connected to a meter while being asked questions. A needle supposedly revealed deep psychological truths.

Scientifically, it was just a simple ohmmeter measuring skin resistance—the same principle behind mood rings. But it cost considerably more and came with significantly more baggage.

Why carry a portable radio when you could wear one on your head? This invention looked like a regular pint-sized baseball cap but contained a tiny AM radio with an antenna poking out the top. Earphones ran down to your ears, letting you listen to broadcasts while keeping your hands free.

The problem was that you looked absolutely ridiculous, like an alien trying to blend in at a baseball game. The reception was terrible, the batteries died quickly, and the whole contraption was uncomfortable.

10 weird historical events that no one has been able to explain (yet)

Image: Walters Art Museum, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Who doesn't like a good mystery? And if the mystery isn’t a work of fiction but the result of a true story, even better! The great unsolved enigmas of history are absolutely fascinating. Some have been solved over time, but there are still many old secrets for which neither scientists nor historians have found an explanation—yet. Time-travel with us as we uncover 10 of the biggest historical mysteries that will probably never be cracked!

Image: Tanner, Henry S., Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Bermeja Island is mentioned in navigation texts written by European travelers and appears in cartography from the 16th to 19th centuries. Old maps place it off the north coast of the Yucatán Peninsula; however, multiple searches over the years have yielded no concrete evidence of its existence.

So, what happened to Isla Bermeja? Was it a cartographic error? Did it sink due to a tidal wave? Because of its geopolitical significance, some have even suggested that it was blown up by the CIA! A 2009 study by the Autonomous University of Mexico concluded that Isla Bermeja does not exist today, nor were any traces found at its supposed coordinates. Yet, it will forever remain a mystery that will surely keep many entertained.

Image: Credit: Big Ear Radio Observatory and North American AstroPhysical Observatory (NAAPO)., Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

In 1977, Ohio State University’s Big Ear radio telescope, used in the search for extraterrestrial intelligence, detected a signal now known as the Wow! signal. While reviewing the data, astronomer Jerry R. Ehman noticed a sequence represented as "6EQUJ5." Baffled by the anomaly, he circled it and wrote "Wow!" in the margins.

The signal lasted 72 seconds and, unfortunately, has never been repeated. To this day, no one can fully explain the phenomenon, although some suggest it may have come from a man-made source. Still, the Wow! signal remains one of the strongest candidates for potential extraterrestrial contact ever detected.

Image: Edward S. Curtis, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

How is it possible for an entire village to vanish without a trace? Believe it or not, this is said to have happened nearly a century ago. According to lore, a small Inuit village in Canada was well known among fur trappers who visited regularly to trade. But in 1930, something very strange supposedly occurred.

A hunter named Joe Labelle claimed he visited the village one day and couldn’t find a single person. Reports said there were guns and food left behind, and even claims that the graves in the cemetery were empty. A thorough investigation, however, found no conclusive evidence of what happened to the villagers. Some witnesses from nearby towns even reported seeing a huge green light. Theories ranged from mass migration to extraterrestrial abductions. The Royal Canadian Mounted Police has since dismissed the case as an urban legend. Some still believe the story to be true.

Image: bbb

We know thousands of shipwreck stories, but this one is quite unique. The MV Joyita, designed to be nearly unsinkable, was found adrift in the South Pacific, practically unharmed, but the crew had disappeared completely.

In October 1955, the American merchant vessel left the port of Apia in Samoa with 16 crew members and 9 passengers bound for the Tokelau Islands. After days without news, a rescue mission was launched. Five weeks later, the Joyita was spotted more than 600 miles west of its intended route. The vessel was partially submerged, and there was no sign of the passengers or crew. Four tons of cargo and all three life rafts were missing. They were never seen again.

Image: Gary Todd from Xinzheng, China, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons

Do you know where one of the best-preserved mummies was found? Hint: not in Egypt. Xin Zhui, the Marquise of Dai during the Western Han Dynasty in China, was discovered in her tomb at Mawangdui 2,000 years after her death, along with hundreds of valuable documents and artifacts.

What makes this mummy so extraordinary is how well-preserved her body is. Her organs and veins remain intact, and she still has hair and even eyelashes. Scientists analyzed the fluid present in the coffin and discovered it was acidic and contained salt and magnesium. They believe this mysterious liquid may have been responsible for preserving Xin Zhui so well. What they don’t know is whether it was intentionally poured into the coffin or came from the body itself.

Image: Yoichi Okamoto, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

The United States has its fair share of presidents who died while in office, but none of our 45 presidents have ever disappeared without a trace. Did you know that this actually happened in The Land Down Under?

Harold Edward Holt was the Prime Minister of Australia from 1966 until his presumed death in 1967. He loved the ocean and spearfishing. During a weekend trip with friends, Holt visited the remote Cheviot Beach to take a swim. Rough sea conditions that day caused him to be swept away by the waves, and he never reappeared. Despite an intensive search, his body was never found, which has given rise to numerous conspiracy theories. Ironically, Australians built the Harold Holt Memorial Swimming Centre in Melbourne in his honor.

Image: FBI, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Many famous criminals have managed to remain unidentified for decades, but the D.B. Cooper case is something else entirely. In 1971, Cooper boarded a flight from Portland to Seattle. Shortly after takeoff, he showed a flight attendant a device he claimed was a bomb and demanded four parachutes and $200,000 in cash.

The crew landed to meet Cooper’s demands in exchange for the passengers and then took off again. As the plane flew over southwestern Washington, Cooper jumped into the cold, rainy night carrying his haul. His whereabouts and true identity were never discovered, although it is likely he didn’t survive the jump. In 1980, some of the ransom money was found near the Columbia River. Although the FBI officially closed the case in 2016, amateur sleuths continue to try to crack it.

Image: Pieter Brueghel the Elder, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Can you imagine an epidemic where the main symptom is uncontrollable dancing? Sounds like science fiction, doesn’t it? Yet this really happened during the Middle Ages. In 1518, a dancing plague struck Strasbourg, Alsace, in what is now France. This strange condition affected up to 400 people, making them dance frantically for weeks. It is said that some even died of heart attacks, exhaustion, or strokes.

Doctors and authorities tried all kinds of measures to stop the spread. They even banned music for a while! To this day, scientists are not certain what caused this bizarre condition: it may have been food poisoning from toxins in the ergot fungus, or perhaps a case of stress-induced mass hysteria.

Image: Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

The Voynich manuscript is a codex written roughly 500 years ago in an unknown language and writing system by an anonymous author. Known as Voynichese, the manuscript was named after Wilfrid Voynich, a Polish bibliophile and antiquarian who purchased it in 1912.

Radiocarbon testing has shown that it dates to the early 15th century. Many cryptographers and codebreakers have attempted to decipher its roughly 240 pages without success. The manuscript contains diagrams and illustrations of unknown plants and astrological symbols. Some believe it may be a made-up language, a secret code, a work of fiction, or even a hoax. If you think you can solve this mystery, the Voynich manuscript is available for viewing at Yale University’s Beinecke Rare Book and Manuscript Library.

Image: Bernhard

Similar to the Voynich manuscript, the Phaistos Disc is a fired clay disc believed to have been created during the Bronze Age. It was discovered by an Italian archaeologist in the basement of a palace in Crete, Greece, in 1908.

What makes this disc fascinating is that it contains a mysterious message. Stamped into the clay is a set of signs, forming a text that many scientists have tried to decipher—without success. It is considered an early attempt at printing, a technological innovation that would not become widespread for several centuries. While enthusiasts still hope the enigma can be solved, this is unlikely unless other documents are discovered to provide context.