COMIC RELIEF

10 Hilarious Quotes from Celebrities That Will Crack You Up

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Charlie Chaplin once said that a day without laughter is a wasted day, and we couldn’t agree more. In a world where humor is often overshadowed by seriousness, people with the ability to laugh at themselves and the silliness of life are like a refreshing breeze on a hot summer day.

Here we gathered 10 moments of comedic brilliance from the mouths of celebrities, writers, and scientists.

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"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."

—Tom Clancy

A world-acclaimed writer of many espionage novels and military thrillers, Tom Clancy offers us a humorous insight into the chaotic nature of reality and the difficulties of storytelling. Certainly, reality is always stranger than fiction!

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"The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it."

—Terry Pratchett

The late Terry Pratchett, the beloved author of the Discworld fantasy series, delivers here a witty remark typical of his irreverent writing style. An open mind is a gift, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be wary of what you let others put into it.

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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe."

—Albert Einstein

Besides being a Nobel laureate and renowned physicist, Albert Einstein was known for his characteristic dry humor and his sarcastic observations about the world. Human nature is paradoxical, we can solve the most complex problems, yet we never seem to completely free ourselves from the yoke of stupidity.

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"I’m not offended by blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb…and I also know that I’m not blonde."

—Dolly Parton

The iconic country music star playfully addresses stereotypes about blonde women in this witty retort. Though Parton has nothing to prove, she shows us with charm and flair that humor and self-awareness are always the best defense against insult and prejudice.

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"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it."

—Bob Hope

Legendary comedian Bob Hope offers a tongue-in-cheek commentary on the absurd quirks of bank logic. And surely... what good does a loan to the already rich do?

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"Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read."

—Groucho Marx

Groucho Marx, the comedic genius behind the Marx Brothers, delivers here one of his hilarious yet absurd jokes. Humor can certainly be found in the most unexpected places, even inside the belly of an unsuspecting dog!

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"Life isn't a fairytale. If you lose a shoe at midnight, you're drunk."

—Darynda Jones

American novelist Darynda Jones offers a humorous twist on the classic Cinderella story by comparing it to reality. We would only like to add that if your Uber also looks like a pumpkin carriage, you might be better off just walking home.

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"I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not quite sure."

—Tommy Cooper

Tommy Cooper was a master of slapstick comedy and absurd humor, and this quote attributed to him encapsulates his personality perfectly. Jokes aside, having a good sense of humor can actually help indecisive people gain more confidence in themselves!

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"I can resist everything except temptation."

—Oscar Wilde

This famous quip of Oscar Wilde captures the essence of his playful yet thoughtful philosophy. Besides making you laugh, hopefully this quote can help lighten up a bit those moments when we feel like we aren’t living up to our expectations—like when you can’t help buying a ton of ice cream right after starting a new diet.

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"When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick."

—George Burns

Legendary comedian George Burns offers a humorous reflection on the passage of time with this amusing remark. Unfortunately, he might be right, as the Dead Sea is actually shrinking at a swift pace.

Words for when you are on top of the world

Happiness has many names: Did you know these 12?

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For Charles M. Schulz, creator of the Peanuts comic strip, happiness is a warm puppy. For some, it's a habit. For others, it is a philosophy, a quest, or an ideal, among many other things. Happiness can be described in as many ways as there are people in the world. It's a feeling that transcends cultures, languages, and time itself, expressed through a rich mosaic of words and idioms. Join us on a linguistic journey through the lexicon of happiness, discovering the many shades and hues that color our most joyful moments.

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Euphoria is a word derived from the Greek word euphoros, which means "bearing well." This term is used to describe a profound and exhilarating sense of joy and elation (more on this one later) that goes beyond conventional happiness.

Euphoria is a state of intense and overwhelming bliss, often linked to extraordinary experiences or events. This term isn't merely about feeling content or pleased; it's about experiencing a surge of heightened emotions that transcend the ordinary. You are not simply happy, you are euphoric.

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Coming from the Old French merriment, this term describes the conviviality and cheerfulness present in shared moments of joy and celebration. It captures the essence of a lively atmosphere filled with laughter, amusement, and unrestrained exultation.

Merriment is a word that often finds its place during festivities or gatherings, highlighting the contagious nature of happiness that spreads among individuals in a collective celebration. It embodies not just personal happiness but also the shared joy.

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Aside from being a George Harrison album, the expression on Cloud Nine has always described extreme happiness. Someone who is on Cloud Nine is experiencing a euphoric sensation.

The expression itself comes from the classifications of clouds defined by the US Weather Bureau in the 1950s, in which Cloud Nine is listed as the fluffy cumulonimbus type considered to be the most attractive of all cloud formations.

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Another word emerging from Old French, gaiete translates into gaiety, a term that embodies a spirited and cheerful attitude. It is used to describe a sense of lightheartedness and exuberance, reflecting the carefree aspects of happiness.

The essence of this term lies in the unreserved expression of happiness that, much like the case of merriment, is often found in moments of shared laughter and shared experiences, where the carefree spirit uplifts both individuals and the collective mood.

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The many nuances of happiness have exact terms to describe every single one. Derived from the Latin elatio, meaning "a raising up", elation represents a profound sense of happiness.

To be elated is to be in an uplifted mood, to experience a feeling of jubilation and a surge of positive emotions that significantly elevate one's spirits. Elation often accompanies moments of personal triumph or success, embodying a state where one feels almost lifted to a higher emotional plane due to the intensity of one's happiness.

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Another word derived from Latin, felicitas translates to "happiness". The term felicity transmits a deep and enduring sense of joy and contentment. It represents a state of true and intense happiness and fulfillment, often associated with a sense of well-being and satisfaction.

To find perfect felicity is to find a happy place for oneself. It might be a simple pleasure as sitting in silence with a book on a comfortable couch or something more profound like achieving a personal goal and taking the time to enjoy it.

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The word blithe sometimes has a less favorable definition: someone who doesn't give enough consideration to a certain issue. Here, we are focusing on the more positive use of the term. Rooted in Old English bliðe, this word is used to describe a cheerful demeanor. It expresses a light-hearted and joyous state, with an absence of worry or trouble.

The term blithe captures a sense of untroubled happiness and a cheerful, carefree attitude toward life in general.

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A state of joy so extreme that makes one feel like being part of an out-of-body experience, the term ecstatic comes from the Greek ekstatikos, which quite literally means "to be outside oneself".

The word ecstatic embodies an overwhelming and heightened state of joy and rapture. It describes an intense emotional experience, where one feels transported beyond normal boundaries of happiness.

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An apt description for when feeling triumphantly happy, the word exultant derives from the Latin exsultare which means "to leap up". It expresses an exuberant and victorious sense of joy, a jubilant celebration or rejoicing, often following a significant achievement or success.

Whether celebrating a significant milestone, being promoted at work, or achieving a long-desired goal, feeling exultant is the natural response.

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Rooted in the Latin jubilatio meaning "to shout for joy", the word jubilant represents an exultant and euphoric state of celebration. It embodies an unrestrained and joyous expression of happiness, often associated with revelry, cheering, and a sense of triumph.

A term that can be aptly associated with cheering crowds in any kind of event, jubilant ties directly to the idea of vocalizing joy, emphasizing the exultant and euphoric nature of this profound emotional state.

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A word that expresses a calmer kind of happiness than most of the ones showcased in this list, blissful is derived from the Old English bliss, which embodies a state of profound and serene happiness.

This term describes an overwhelming sense of contentment, tranquility, and joy, often associated with an idyllic state of being. To be blissful is to experience a deep and enduring form of happiness, where one feels completely at peace with oneself and fulfilled.

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A popular contemporary expression, over the moon describes a feeling of immense happiness or delight. It conveys the idea of being so elated that one feels as if one has soared past the moon, signifying a state of sheer ecstasy and euphoria.

The origin of this expression comes from a well-known 16th-century nursery rhyme called "Hey Diddle Diddle" (originally written as "High Diddle Diddle"). The rhyme itself has no meaning, but it says: "Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed to see such fun and the dish ran away with the spoon!"